Wilfork--known as a solid defender, excellent run stopper, and the fattest goddamned person ever to be seen on a football field ever in the history of everything--reportedly devoured Rice in only two bites, only pausing briefly to spit out his helmet.
When asked to explain his actions, Vince casually replied, "When you see somethin' that says 'Cheetos' on it, you don't stop to check if it's really got Cheetos in it. You just eat it. Sometimes the bag, too. So I see somethin' that says 'Rice' on it and I'm like, 'Yeah, I could go for some rice right now.' Turns out it was a guy instead. [shrugs] Hey, nobody's perfect."
Wilfork's girth has caused him issues before, often making him the butt (pun absolutely intended) of numerous jokes.
|It's almost too easy.|
|Wilfork daydreaming about Pop Tarts and chocolate cake|
Wilfork then licked his lips, stomach rumbling as reporters fled in terror.